hello.
i feel damn ____ over everything-
fucked friendship+even more fucked up bitch of a mother+post a levels mundane lifestyle.
i don't know how to start this off properly so-
what dyou want me to do. this isn't my fault. you're being a fucker and you should know it. don't know how we even got to this, wasted friendships and relations, so many years thrown away in an instant. i don't even know what im feeling now. a mix of emotions, mostly negative but nothing i can do about them. i'm furious, frustrated, jealous, sad, annoyed (and whatever describes something along that line).
i just didn't think i was that disposable.
jealous-- i shouldn't be. but i am inherently someone who gets jealous over little things and so yes, i'm as jealous as fuck although i know it isn't _'s fault. i should be nice about it but i can't. not a nice feeling when you're being replaced. but fuck whatever you think. i will work at not being jealous. i just need.. time.
have been trying not to be bothered by it but it suddenly hit me hard today. amidst the emotional turmoil and crying, i guessed/figured this wouldn't be important to you in any way. afterall, you turned your back on me.

Labels: hopes and dreams